Sleeping Bags and Coats

Tags

Choices, Compassion, Homeless

Good Morning W.S.A

I have a beautiful coat I would like to donate to the homeless. I’ve only worn it a couple of times and it cost me a couple of hundred pounds.

Ok…?

It needs cleaning, but I can’t afford it. It’s going to cost me £60.

Why does it need cleaning?

It’s mouldy.

Mouldy…?

Yes mouldy, only a little bit, but it would be lovely for someone on the street.

I’m sorry we really couldn’t accept it if it’s mouldy.

Can’t you clean it?

No, I’m afraid we don’t have the facilities to clean it before we gave it to someone.

But they would love it. It’s a lovely coat and only a little bit mouldy.

I’m sorry we really couldn’t accept a mouldy coat for our friends on the street. Many have breathing problems associated with being homeless and we really couldn’t give them a mouldy coat and make it worse.

Oh, ok, so you’re telling me you don’t want a lovely coat?

How ungrateful.

 

Charities don’t have an excess of money to spend on cleaning clothes before giving them to the homeless. We rely on you to donate good quality and clean clothing to help us keep our overheads down and focus our money on where the help is really needed. You would be the first to complain if we were routinely spending money out on specialist cleaning and not meeting the needs of those in our community who need support.

 

Good afternoon W.S.A

Oh hello, I have a couple of sleeping bags I would like to donate to the homeless.

Oh that would be lovely thank you.

They’re in good condition but the zip is broken so they don’t do up.

I’m afraid they wouldn’t really be suitable for us to give out as sleeping bags then.

But I’ve used them like this for years, there’s nothing wrong with them. A scrounger could just wrap it round themselves or cover themselves over. They’re lovely and warm.

I really am sorry, but we believe that our homeless friends should be given things in working condition.

So you’re telling me that a homeless person wouldn’t want to have a sleeping bag? There’s nothing wrong with them, I’ve used them like this for years!

I’m sure they are lovely and someone would find them useful but we believe in giving sleeping bags that are new, or as new and in working order.

I can’t believe you can afford to be so picky – those scroungers don’t have the right to be fussy.

I really am sorry you feel like that. But we believe…

I’ve had enough of your beliefs, they should be grateful for anything they can get.

Goodbye.

Does someone who lives in a flat deserve a lower quality item than someone who lives in a house? Just because their ‘home’ is a shop doorway, under a bridge or under a bush does not mean that they should have to accept anything that they are given. They are human, just like you and me. Embarrassed and depressed about their situations they deserve to be treated with love and kindness, not spoken about like they are scroungers. These people have lost everything, and we have the power to kick them whilst they are down, or give them a little token of our thoughts for them. We can share some kindness and give them some hope that someone does care enough to bother with them. What message does it give them if we let them have second rate items? Are they second rate too? An easy thought to have when you feel rock bottom.

Don’t get me wrong it’s lovely that people want to think about those who are less fortunate and in need of help, but, and it’s a big but, please think about what you are donating, and please remember

There but for the grace of God, go I.

Three Months Later

Tags

Children, Choices, Christianity, Christmas, Compassion, faith, Family, Holidays

It has been (almost) three months since I started paid employment for two companies. Before I started I had a lot of preconceived ideas about what each of those roles would be. Boy was I wrong!! The job I thought I was going to love and that I would need as a welcome break from the mundaneness of the other, has become the one I dread going to – the one I would happily ring in sick for, if it didn’t mean letting people down. I realised today that I am quite simply BORED!! Uh-oh that is really not good.

Now the job that I was most nervous about, due to lack of previous experience (for “lack of”, read NO) and no qualifications that would help me, I have fallen in love with. I’m even becoming more of a morning person, as I enjoy going to work. Even in these cold, depressing mornings (when usually I would hide under the duvet and pretend the world didn’t exist until lunchtime) I am finding no problems getting out of bed and leaving for work. Ok maybe that’s not quite 100% true. The only problem is four children getting out of bed, well actually that’s a little unfair on two of the children – Son 1 and Son 2 are the culprits in this little saga. They are taking between an hour and 90 minutes to get out of bed. Consequently, this means I’m having to get up earlier to try and get them up so that they won’t be late to school (again, and again, and again, and….. well you get the idea!).

The work excites me. I am kept busy, but not so busy I feel like I’m drowning. The variety of work certainly keeps me on my toes. You never know who will walk through the door or phone up next. From dear old ladies that want to chat for ages about the corns on their feet or the perm they want doing but not sure “if there’s too much of the old perm left“, to disadvantaged people who just need a little practical support, the variety is never ending.

Today however, I was truly blessed by a young family that came into reception. The two boys, possibly twins, although remembering how I felt when people said that about my two boys who were born a year apart, I won’t make any assumptions. Anyway, these two boys helped their mum bring in some carrier bags of toys, the bags were roughly the same size as the children. These little voices asked me where they could put the toys for the “trildren that don’t get presents.” I was so touched by their eagerness to give something to children that I asked the mother for her address, she didn’t want to give it to me, said she didn’t need thanking or anything like that, she just wanted to give quietly and anonymously. Right there, that mother taught her small children that giving is best done from the heart, quietly and with compassion. The boys smiled at me, and I melted. “Please let me send them a Christmas Card to say thank you for helping you bring the toys in. I can do it from Santa, if you want?” Her face relaxed and she said that would be lovely. I thought I recognised the road name as being local, but no. This family had travelled 40 miles (give or take) to donate these presents as quietly as possible. Such love and blessings!

It did make me think though – how far would I be prepared to travel (physically or emotionally) to give people who need help that practical support without recognition for what I had done?

Lord, bless the family that came in today and donated toys to those who don’t look forward to the celebration of your birth. May love shine from us, as it did from those two boys. May they remain curious about the world and eager to help people less well off than them. Lord, be close to all the families that will be touched through giving or receiving presents this Christmas time. May they experience your peaceful comfort and know that you are the reason for the season.

Amen

Politically and Religiously Neutral

Tags

being neutral, chaos survival, faith, home care

In care work we are told to be politically and religiously neutral. In many cases this is probably a great idea. I certainly wouldn’t want to get into a political debate with the people I was providing personal care to. However, I cannot and will not be religiously neutral.

Every single one of our customers is asked if they follow a religion. A high percentage say they are Christian. Whether they are or not is a matter between them and God. I can only show them God’s love through my patience, and kindness in caring for them, and in doing the best job I can do.

As a uniformed care worker, I wear a watch fob. Nothing surprising there, most of us do. What may be surprising is the meaning behind mine and the reasons as to why I chose the one I did.

So here it is. Yes, it’s a foot! Some may think this is a little tactless when so many of the people I visit have trouble with their feet and walking. But, I wear it as a religious symbol. A way of saying,

I walk with God

A visual reminder of my favourite Poem:

Footprints

a way of remembering that if I walk in God’s steps,

I will be safe.

And perhaps most importantly to remind me that as Jesus himself took on the role of washing the feet of his disciples, I too need to follow his lead in caring and following his example of active service.

I pray that my customers can see the difference in me, and that through my actions they can see the love of God and experience the peace and healing power of God’s work in their lives.

“Oh Dear Sylvia”

Tags

Audio Book, Choices, Dawn French, Death and Dying, Obedience, Respect

Today, I finished listening to the audio book “Oh Dear Sylvia” written and narrated by Dawn French.

The story line is focussed on Sylvia who has had an ‘accident’ falling from her balcony, and is now in a coma. Her family, housekeeper, and partner all come in to see her in Suite 5, and talk to her.

The storyline is touching, with the right amount of humour and the final chapter where all life support is withdrawn is approached tastefully and with a great respect. I sometimes think that comedians and comedy does death and dying with more success than dramas.

Well, all this got me thinking about what I would do if I was in the different character’s positions. What would I want if it was me?

That’s too big an issue to deal with in this blog tonight, I’m tired for a start and ready to head to bed because it has been one of those days! However, I do know that I need to have this conversation with my loved ones. What do they want if that situation ever occurred to them? No matter how hard that conversation might be to bring up or have, I think it’s really important that we face these issues and find out what our relative’s wishes are, what their expectations are for their care.

It’s not about saying we want them to die, but about saying we want them to continue to have dignity throughout any life limiting illness or life threatening condition. That when the time comes, and the medical teams broach that subject with us about withdrawing treatment we know what our loved one expects, and we can fulfil their one last request. As a child that may be hard, but ultimately isn’t that the ultimate in respect, being obedient for one last time?

The same thing applies to organ donation, maybe that’s an easier way of bring the subject up with the ones we love, and end-of-life care can be a continuation of that conversation.

It’s not just important to talk to our parents, but also to our children. I know nobody wants to think about their child dying before them, but accidents happen. Illness happens. Why make a heart breaking decision any harder, if you know what they want, how they feel, then there is no decision to make. Just total respect, and love for that person.

So, I’m going to head off to bed – and I’m going to have this conversation with my parents and my teenagers as soon as I can. That way, if and when it happens, the chaos will be slightly less and I will just be doing as I am told for one last time.

So thank you Dawn French, for a sensitive and dignified story that gives me a great way of starting the conversation with those I love.

Not Enough Hours……. In the Night!

Tags

chaos survival, Children, home care, sleep

How many times do we say we need more hours in the day to get everything completed? Not me, I say I need more hours in the night. I find that I work so much better during the day if I have managed to get a decent night’s sleep in. So often sleep is the first thing to go when we are busy – I’ll just get up a little earlier, or I’ll just finish this before bed. Sleeping is something that takes little priority in our busy lives. Then we wonder why we are getting so stressed and feel so run down.

The trouble for me is I work two jobs, have four children that need my attention just when I’m having to get out the door or really wanting to get the housework done., and commitments to a brass band and choir. Now don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy my jobs, my children and these activities, but not when it takes away my sleep time.

Sleep is important! I could link to hundreds, if not thousands of studies where sleep has been proven to be a greater benefit than we think or studies into the effects of sleep deprivation on the brain. But what would be the point? We’ve heard these stories in the news so many times, but we don’t believe it, because “I’m fine with a little less sleep” really..?

Anyway, I’m now being guilty of stopping myself from getting to bed and therefore sleeping. I have just had a busy day with both band and choir taking part in church today, and staying in-between services for a dinner (wow that chilli con carne was gooood) After all that I did a twilight shift of home care. And I have to be up early to get the kids up for school as well as getting myself ready for work! Chaos? Only if there’s not enough sleep involved!

Home Care Wages in the News

Tags

home care, minimum wage, news, scaremongering

I love my job as a home care support worker. I get to meet some amazing people who have masses of life experience and interesting stories to tell. I could sit with them for hours, drinking tea and listening to their memories.

A couple of days ago I read this news story on the BBC, it was talking about home carers not being paid for their travel time. Well, no, why would we get paid for driving between calls? We’re not working, and you wouldn’t normally get paid for the time it takes you to travel to another job.

Anyway, this got me thinking and I decided to check out my wages and what it means in real terms. I wish I hadn’t! Thanks BBC for this information! (Can’t you sense the sarcasm there?!)

Are you ready for some maths on a Saturday evening?

My wages are £7.24 per hour call. Halve it for a 30 minute call and quarter it for a 15 minute call (you get the idea).  I work 5pm-10pm 3 days a week. Let’s use what I call week 1, in that there are no enhancements for the weekend. My mileage is paid at 30p a mile.

Here’s the maths:

I have eight calls a night. Five of them are 30 minutes. Two are 15 minutes and One is 45 minutes. That’s 3.75 hours a night (out of 5 that I’m on duty) That gives me a daily wage of £7.24 x 3.75 = £27.15.

This round, is 16 miles. 16 x 0.30p = £4.80.

Wages £27.15 + Fuel £4.80 = £31.95

Divide this by the five hours I work = £6.39.

Minimum wage is £6.50

Weekend Rate

I have the same calls, therefore that figure stays the same 3.75. And my mileage is still 16 miles = £4.80.

My enhanced wages for the weekend is £8.56

So

£8.56 x 3.75 = £32.10

+ mileage = £36.90

Divide by the five hours I work = £7.38. That’s better!

It’s not so cut and dry as maybe people would think. Over the two week rota I work 5 week days which gives me £159.75. Two weekend days gives me £73.80.

£159.75 + £73.80 = £233.55

£233.55 divided by the 30 hours I work over the two weeks = £7.785

More than the minimum wage. So thanks BBC for the scaremongering, it’s been really helpful. I might not get much more than the minimum wage but it is more.

Like all statistics, they can be manipulated to suit your agenda. But please don’t use them to scare people into thinking their care workers are being illegally paid. We might not get enough for what we do, but we do get more than the minimum wage.

National Day

Tags

bad jokes, Christianity, Halloween, Holidays, National Day

According to http://nationaldaycalendar.com/ it is national caramel apple day and national “knock knock joke” day. How suitably cheesy seeing as it’s Halloween and kids are knocking on the doors for treats.

Knocking on doors may cause fear and annoyance, but isn’t great that when Jesus knocks on the door of our heart we can have a new life in Him! Isn’t it fantastic that we can use everyday things and events to bring the good news of God to people who would otherwise not hear?

Last night my Corps Officer shared this picture on her newsfeed – it’s been sat on my desk all day – what a wonderful way of changing the meaning of Halloween pumpkins and bringing light into this world of darkness.

Leave a comment below and share your favourite knock knock jokes?

Back to Work

My first day back to work after a five day break was uneventful. I had two messages from the volunteer receptionists, one telling me who the designated first aider was for the group they run, and the other letting me know several sets of forms for the Parent Child Contact Centre had been printed off.

I didn’t have many e-mails either. Just 14 in my inbox, and about eight of those were to do with mail delivery warning/failure. I checked the previous receptionist’s e-mail – 123 Spam messages! Well they were deleted pretty quick.

So, a quiet and uneventful day. Bored..? No. It gave me time to book some more speakers/entertainers for the two groups I have responsibility for. I even managed to get the posters advertising a visiting band displayed around the building. All caught up for the chaos of tomorrow!

Holidays – Last Day of My Break

Tags

chaos survival, Coffee, Friends, Fun, Future

Today I caught up with a special friend. It was a much needed catch up. We haven’t  seen each other in weeks, although we text most days. He is my “soul mate”, when I am with him I feel complete. Together, we have been through so much. Tears, laughter, anger – you name the emotion we have shared it together. He has held me tight through the bad times and celebrated the good times with me. Without him I am lost.

We have been friends for 19 years. He deserves a medal for putting up with me for so long. I’m sure I am one of the reasons the grey hairs are creeping in at his youthful age.

So we went for a coffee. 9am and he picks me up and we drive to a well-known Coffee Shop (can it really be that this place has one of these coffee houses? Wow! Getting with-it then sleepy town). We park up and run through the rain. Laughing, we order our coffee and start chatting with the easiness that is between us, you would never have guessed that it had been so long ago that we last got to spend some time together.

We chat about work, his and mine, we discuss the future. Some crazy ideas and massive changes were put forward and talked about. Wow, he has some choices to make. In some ways I am envious of the opportunities that he has opened up for himself. He has worked so hard to get where he is, and to be in demand like he is, well that’s just great. I really hope he gets to follow his dreams – just hope that those dreams don’t take him into another time-zone to me for that length of time. I’m not sure I could cope with missing him so much.

He has to get to work, so we run through the rain again and head back to reality. We chat all the way home, and finally we hug. That warm safe hug that I never want to break away from. I am still amazed by his tenderness and gentleness. The quiet strength that comes from being in his arms. I will miss him, until we get to catch up again. I hope that I’ll see him again soon, however I know that my home care shifts are awkward, and his working hours are unimaginable, and catching up again this side of Christmas will be a major challenge.

Still, it was great to see him, and until next time, I will settle for the texts, and treasure every moment I get to spend with this very special friend.

Love Heart Messages

Tags

Love Hearts

I will! I surrender all mine hearts desires [to follow your will Oh Lord!]